Reply to Wedding Advice - WWYD if you could do it over?

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[quote=Anonymous]1) Use the website and book A Practical Wedding. Will keep you grounded when all you are reading is crazy OMG YOU HAVE TO HAVE ___ all the time.

2) Check out WeddingBee.com  Another great resource of women who are down to earth about weddings.

3) As an Asian, I know how important it is to not lose face and embarrass your family (especially your Mom). So have meeting with her and find out what is most important to her. But also letting her know that she might not get everything she wants. In Project Managment it's called, Finding and Setting Stakeholder Expectations. Find her top 3 things that she cannot live without.

4) It's also important to know what your expectations are. So what I did was write down a list of all the parts of a wedding (dress, food, venue, flowers, rings, veil, shoes, invitations, etc). Then I found the top 10 most important, then the top 5. Then I ranked my top 3 things. And I used this as my guide as I made decisions. For instance, I was in a tizzy because I couldn't find an invitation that I liked that wasn't $10 per invite (once you included rsvp, envelope, etc). I was trying to decide if I should just suck it up and pay for it since I was having a small wedding and only needed like 50 invites. But I went  back to my list and found that invites weren't in my top 10. Not worth paying that kind of money for something I originally didn't feel strongly about. So I found decent, but not perfect invitations on Zazzle. (Plus everyone just throws away invites, so why spend tons of money on them?)

But for my Mom, not running out of food was very important to her. A friend's daughter had a wedding where they ran out of food and years later they were still talking about it behind her back. So I spent waaaay to much money on my cocktail party to make sure we had enough passed h'ors d.

5) Pay good money for a good photographer or 2. That is the only tangible thing you have after the wedding. In the DC area plan for at least $2,500 (if you are lucky), but closer to $3,000+

6) Remember at the end of the day,  nothing except one thing is important--not the food, the clothes, the venue, the flowers, nothing except You and the Groom saying I DO. For that all you need is a License, officiant, witness, you and groom. Everything else is gravy. You and your Groom decide what gravy is important and worth paying for and what isn't. Don't let family or magazines tell you otherwise.

Good Luck and have fun![/quote]

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