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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My teens only said this to us a few times, however I never punished them for saying something like that to their dad or me. I believe teenagers are dealing with enough emotionally, so I'll give them a pass on these sort of occasional outbursts. What I would punish is acting like this is public, or any kind of behavior that's out of control, like throwing or breaking things, and certainly hitting. [b]Words -- I let it be, however I won't engage beyond a certain point with a tantruming teen. I will leave the room or tell them to do so until they can be civil[/b].[/quote]

Same here. "I hate you" is an "I" statement about how they're feeling at that moment. Who am I to quibble or punish someone for what they're feeling? Now if it moves into name-calling, derogatory statements, etc, then we're in a different place. You can be angry and upset. But you don't get to be physical, hurl insults or yell. Like PP, I stop engaging by walking away and letting them know I'll talk when they're ready to do so appropriately.

--mom of a 14 year old and former 6th grade teacher[/quote]

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