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[quote=Anonymous]We were looking to build a house but decided to wait a few years to build up more funds.  Our in-laws, out of the blue, offered up a large sum of money so that we can build right now on the condition that we also build an attached guest house for them.  Initially, we said that we have not seen the right piece of land yet and thus we can't proceed with their offer.  However, a great one popped up unexpectedly.  We were so enthralled by the land that we did not consider the full ramifications of this arrangement.  Now we have a contract on the land, we don't know what to do because we can't stand my FIL.  We considered backing out of the land deal, but my in-laws indicate  that they would be greatly hurt by us backing out and threatened to move away across the country.  The main reasons we don't want to live with my in-laws is because my FIL is emotionally abusive towards our family.  He constantly criticizes my MIL and DH including trivial things such as their haircuts, the fact that my husband is left handed,  the shoes my DH is wearing and how they make coffee.  He has always disliked me until I had our first child and then I became the goose that laid the golden egg.  DH and I always feel like we have to tip toe around him.  He holds this deal over our heads as if he has gave us a tremendous gift (even though they are literally paying for construction of their portion of the house and the property taxes and utility costs upfront).  My MIL wants us to proceed with the deal because she wants to live next to her grandchild and she is delusional that she can keep his negativity from us.  She is hurt that we want to pull out of this deal but we don't know what to do.  What should we do to keep our sanity but not hurt his parents?  [/quote]

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