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[quote=Muslima] http://nyti.ms/1HnkDOC

Fascinating read. I couldn't help but notice so many parallels with Saudi culture in the article above.I'd like to preface this by saying that I know and understand that there are many laws, cultural norms in Saudi Arabia that are   misogynistic and stem from tribalism and the fact that Bedouin society has always been segregated.  I'm not debating that.  Where I want to take the conversation is more on the article's point that there are many upper class women in the US who  are educated stay at home parents who live very segregated lives from their male counterparts in a non segregated culture. However,  this is completely acceptable and these same women are praised for their selfless choices and these choices are culturally acceptable. However,  when  women in other parts of the world make these same choices,  they are automatically labeled as brainwashed and submissive. The part where the author  states :
“It’s easier and more fun,” the women insisted when I asked about the sex segregation that defined their lives.“We prefer it,” the men told me at a dinner party where husbands and wives sat at entirely different tables in entirely different rooms" is particularly telling. As I could see Saudi men and women answering this question the same way,  using the same logic. Thoughts?

[quote] The women I met, mainly at playgrounds, play groups and the nursery schools where I took my sons, were mostly 30-somethings with advanced degrees from prestigious universities and business schools. They were married to rich, powerful men, many of whom ran hedge or private equity funds; they often had three or four children under the age of 10; they lived west of Lexington Avenue, north of 63rd Street and south of 94th Street; and they did not work outside the home.

Instead they toiled in what the sociologist Sharon Hays calls “intensive mothering,” exhaustively enriching their children’s lives by virtually every measure, then advocating for them anxiously and sometimes ruthlessly in the linked high-stakes games of social jockeying and school admissions.
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[quote] 
But as my inner anthropologist quickly realized, there was the undeniable fact of their cloistering from men. There were alcohol-fueled girls’ nights out, and women-only luncheons and trunk shows and “shopping for a cause” events. There were mommy coffees, and women-only dinners in lavish homes. There were even some girlfriend-only flyaway parties on private planes, where everyone packed and wore outfits the same color.

“It’s easier and more fun,” the women insisted when I asked about the sex segregation that defined their lives.

“We prefer it,” the men told me at a dinner party where husbands and wives sat at entirely different tables in entirely different rooms.

Sex segregation, I was told, was a “choice.” But like “choosing” not to work, or a Dogon woman in Mali’s “choosing” to go into a menstrual hut, it struck me as a state of affairs possibly giving clue to some deeper, meaningful reality while masquerading, like a reveler at the Save Venice ball the women attended every spring, as a simple preference.[/quote]

And then,  there's the wife bonus.  I'd be curious to know if any DCUM moms get end of year bonuses?

[Quote]A wife bonus, I was told, might be hammered out in a pre-nup or post-nup, and distributed on the basis of not only how well her husband’s fund had done but her own performance — how well she managed the home budget, whether the kids got into a “good” school — the same way their husbands were rewarded at investment banks. In turn these bonuses were a ticket to a modicum of financial independence and participation in a social sphere where you don’t just go to lunch, you buy a $10,000 table at the benefit luncheon a friend is hosting.[/quote]

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