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[quote=Anonymous]This is long.. but I need input...
-grew up as an orphan, along with my 3 siblings.. parents died in a terrible accident when my oldest brother was in college and I, the youngest, was 6.
-raised begrudgingly by unsupportive aunts and uncles, the 3 youngest went to boarding school, we all have college degrees.
-My family was very well off before my parents died but raising kids, boarding school x3, college x4, basically drained all the money my parents had stashed away.
-of the 4 of us... 2 are "very successful."  My oldest brother is an executive for a fortune 500 company and lives in Europe.  I am married to an attorney for a major pharma company and I have my own strong, but not terribly lucrative, career.
-My other brother has symptoms of aspbergers, though was not diagnosed as a kid in the 80s with out parents to advocate for him, he is a genius and went to Stanford and is making a good living as a programmer on the west coast.  We have a minimal relationship since he can't speak on the phone.  But I know he is happy and healthy and surrounded by good people and in a good relationship with someone who gets him.
-My sister, who is older than me by 3 years, has always been the black sheep.  She had clear mental illness growing up which surfaced after my parents death... she never received treatment.  When to the equivalent of a reform school in high school... a boarding school for "underperforming" kids while my brother and I both went to top schools(think Andover/Exeter).  My brother and I both went on to good/great colleges (Stanford and Georgetown).
-Basically my sister is the only one who did not thrive, she stayed in New England when the rest of us moved away, has no husband or anyone to look after her, is extremely unstable and won't seek counseling, works a government job so she wont get fired which is her one saving grace.  She was diagnosed by a psych with borderline personality disorder, and is completely alone and unsupported - her psych does not force her to get therapy and she needs it so badly!  I am certain she has no friends and I am making the guess that she has considered suicide multiple times over the years.  She is always so depressed when I speak with her but always refused to get help (going on 10 years)
-I have basically no relationship with her, I see her 1x per year at the holidays and call her 1x per year on her birthday.  
-She was extremely abusive to me in my childhood.  She broke bones, hit me daily and set me on fire once when I was sleeping and I received 3rd degree burns... very terrible things. I lied to doctors as a child to protect her.  My aunts and uncles knew what was going on and did nothing.  How you look at a 4th grader who had her hair burned off and accept "I did it on accident" as an excuse is negligent on behalf of the adults in my life at that time.  I still have a major scalp/upper-facial scar from that time.
-I feel "bad" about not having a relationship but she was so hurtful to me as a child I actually don't care.  I feel guilt because I know her life is complete shit, as does she, and don't know how to help her since she wont go in to therapy and I also feel guilty because most of me doesn't care, and I feel like I should since she is my sister.
-I feel "bad" because I won't pay for her to do intensive in patient therapy, though I could swing it if I and my oldest brother really committed to it.  She would lose her job from taking so much time off so it goes beyond the actual financial support of the program which would be upwards of 100k.  I would rather put that money toward my kids' college fund.
-I feel "bad" because I don't have the time/energy/empathy/patience to support her emotionally on a regular basis.  
-I feel "bad" that I don't think she will ever be healthy.... ever.

Saying this here is sort of amazing.  If you looked at me you'd think I had a perfect life.  That wasp girl who went to boarding school and Georgetown then married well and had 2 healthy kids.[/quote]

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