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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wish I had the answer. Two of my kids were very interested in being well-rounded as tweens/teens, one of my kids has been much more challenging in that regard. She's a reluctant reader, not althletically inclined, and not really very ambitious about developing interests and talents. I sort of insisted she have at least one outside activity every week -- for a while it was volleyball, later it was guitar lessons. She still is the kid who likes lots of time to just watch youtube videos and chat online with friends. I give her lots of space to do this, however sometimes we put our foot down and encourage her to do something else, like take the dog for a walk or try her hand at making a new recipe in the kitchen (she likes cooking). If it's any comfort at all, I think tweens sometimes get more morivated to branch out as they move into adolescence. DD is more open to new things now at 16 than she was at 12 or 13, for example.[/quote]

I think this is a wise reply. OP, your child may change as she moves from tween to teen.

Also, I know other parents like the one who posted here, parents who do insist that a child have at least one outside activity every week -- a music lesson, a once-a-week sport (obviously we're not talking about pushing some kind of intense team sport or travel team etc.), or a class in art or dance or even a school-related extracurricular. For the PP's child I'd even suggest that the parents find her a teen cooking class -- there are now more and more cooking schools around our area and several offer cooking classes or one-time cooking workshops aimed at tweens/teens!

OP, I think it's fine to do as the PP did and tell your child that there needs to be one activity a week, and she gets to choose it -- but it's going to happen. Give your daughter lots of choice so she feels she has some control here -- tweens and teens really crave control, so give it where you can.

She may have no idea at all that there are a lot of activities available that are not just being on a sports team. Or see if she would be interested in volunteering somewhere if she's old enough. There are some age restrictions on volunteering at various places but not all. Does she have a pet? Maybe volunteer at an animal-related charity. And so on. If she's watching animal videos on YouTube, talk with her and see if she wants to work with real animals too. If she's watching music videos, maybe she would actually be interested in a class at the School of Rock if there's one near you (kids' music school chain--friend's daughter loves singing rock there). And so on.

Please don't worry at this point about how things will look to colleges, or about her being "well-rounded" with languages or leadership skills as you mention in your post. Focus for now on getting her in an activity that interests HER. What she chooses might seem like it's not meeting an adult definition of well-rounded or building up skills for college, but anything that gets her thinking and interacting and creating will actually help her overall. Right now the issue is just getting her up and out of the house and off electronics for a while.

OP, is your daughter interested in anything that's available at school? Our middle school has an ecology club that does a lot of plantings around the school; after-school drama; newspaper; a Lego robotics club; an art club. Yeah, the school year's nearly over so that ship has sailed for now, but next year, I would see if she might want to try a school-based club or activity. If she has school friends doing it that might prompt her to do more. 
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