Reply to Complicated Issue: Best Way to Blend this Unique Family????

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]First, don't go into any conversations with defined solutions. You have some valid questions about handling finances. So that's the discussion you need to have - "do we need a prenup, what of our finances do we want to merge, what do we need to think about keeping in trust for our children" etc and not "put me on the house or else"

You currently don't have his house, you have yours. If this new marriage ends in one, ten, or thirty years, if you don't merge your stuff, that will still not change. You have made it clear that you don't want him having a piece of your stuff. Sounds like you're starting to think down the path of "what's mine is mine and what's yours is mine". Bad move - makes you sound like a gold digger. Are you? [/quote]

My concern is not divorce. My concern is what if something happens to him and I'm seen as the step-mom living in their and their mom's house? Too many episodes of Judge Judy I guess.[/quote]

I'd go to a lawyer for a pre-nup/estate planning.   You could get a "life estate" for the house, so that in case, god forbid, something happened to him, you'd have the right to live in the house as long as you wanted to, and then it would go to the kids when you are gone.

I would tread carefully about moving in, though.   Those girls are at a tender age to have lost their mother.  A year is blip in their grieving process.  This will only be their second Mother's day without her.   They'd have to be incredibly emotionally mature to welcome you into the home with open arms, something 17 year olds aren't exactly known for.  [/quote]

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