Reply to How to deal with parents & in-laws who just don't get that we're busy?

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[quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thanks for your suggestions, all, especially about dropping the word "busy." I love that!

I guess I have two different situations, one with my in-laws and one with my father. My in-laws are local for half the year, then away the other half. I'm probably not as proactive as I should be about getting together--or getting them together with the kids--while they're here but I'm no slouch either. It's a challenge because when they're here it's during the school year, and between homework, sports, music lessons, plans with friends, etc., it is hard to nail my kids down. Every summer we visit them at their other house, but it seems we never stay long enough. I get so tired of feeling like what we do is never enough.

My father is another story. He lives in San Francisco and visits once very 1-2 years or so, which I'm grateful for, as we've managed only two trips in the past decade or so. Apart from that, we all have only a phone/email relationship with him. And as I mentioned, I don't always get back to him right.that.minute. This is the text I got today: "I know that your family is extremely busy. I never know what is the best way to communicate with you. Whether I send an email or a text, your response is never immediate. Sometimes days later. I never no why, not that this is important, but it makes it very hard to correspond with you. I guess I could call, but I have tried that and you have not always answered, whether I call home or cell. Just very confusing for me. Text and email, sometimes even phone, make the transmission of mood, inflection, tone, etc., either impossible or subject to misinterpretation. One of the drawbacks of technology today. This is why, when we are actually together, I anticipate us having in depth conversations about whatever you have been thinking you want to say to me and haven’t. Maybe there are never any of these thoughts. We don’t seem to have these conversations."

I honestly don't know how to respond to this. It has really thrown me for a loop!
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