Reply to What is my obligation? (Regarding possible child sexual abuse.)

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[quote=Anonymous]Have you considered consulting an attorney?  Would you consider filing charges against your Dad if it's still possible?  Filing charges would probably prompt a CPS investigation of the household and interviews with any other children with whom he still has contact.

If you can't afford an attorney, maybe you can find one thru a non-profit sexual abuse organization or a law school clinic like Georgetown's domestic violence clinic (which should cover sexual abuse as well).

Morally, I think you have an obligation to tell the stepmom.  And, frankly, perhaps also your sister directly.

Do you have a therapist?  A therapist might also help you untangle this.  A therapist might also be bound to disclose knowledge of any sexual abuse; however, the basis for what kind of "knowledge" puts the therapist in the position of notifying CPS is unclear.  I'm not sure if your telling the therapist that your Dad abused you and discussing the signs of abuse you see in your sister would qualify as forcing the therapist to engage in the legally mandated reporting of sexual abuse.

Deciding to tell is difficult because many people will blame you for the fallout of telling.  But, remember, if your Dad hadn't engaged in the behavior, there would be nothing to tell.  All you can do with those that you tell is make it clear that once you properly understood these incidents, you felt you had no other choice, ethically, but to disclose and be honest.

These family systems can only be perpetuated in secrecy.  Telling is key to ending the cycle.[/quote]

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