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[quote=Anonymous]Be kind.  This is new territory for us.

Last weekend, our relationship with MIL hit a new low and we decided to cut off ties with her.  She says and does too many harmful things & the cycle of nasty -&gt; apology -&gt; second/third/millionth chance is just too exhausting.  DH finally told her not to come around or contact us again (and followed up by cc'ing his entire extended family with details of some of the lowlights so that there would be no uncertainty about our unwillingness to interact with her at any future family events).  Extended family has been very understanding & supportive.  I've never cut ties with a family member before, but I believe it really, truly is the end of my interaction with her.  DH has attempted reconciliations before, but they don't last long, so I think he really, truly is done too.

With me & DH, there was no physical harm, but the emotional nastiness was unbelievable.  With DC, she was mostly just super flaky & untrustworthy, but there were occasional, really bad lapses of judgement with respect to safety.  He's ok, but we will never allow her to be alone with him for as long as we have any say in the matter.

DC is almost 10 and is understandably really confused by it all.  We've explained about the estrangement and tried to assure him that this is not his fault.  We've also placed a 'rule' on DCs inbox that will redirect any emails from MIL to DH, and we've told DC that we are monitoring this and explained why.

We are leaving the country soon, so there won't be much face to face interaction anyhow for at least a year.  But as DC gets older, more independent, more private, and possibly more curious about MIL, how much can/do you try to shield and protect your kid?   I'm not out to slander MIL, but I don't want her to hurt him.[/quote]

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