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[quote=Anonymous] 1. Your brother has never had to care or think about anyone else! He really has NO clue what you're sacrificing, and by the time he has a family your mother will have passed away, so don't expect any help. All you might get from him is regret in 20 years. 2. Communicate this directly to him in a clear and calm manner without hyperbole. That you are disappointed with his lack of responsibility, and that you feel put upon because at this time in your life there is so much on your plate. 3. Don't cut him off. Just don't call or see him if you don't want to. 4. Alternatively, you could invite him to stay with you for a few days, and make sure he's involved in the whirlwind. Have him keep an eye on Grandma, on the kids, on the cooking, all at the same time. Perhaps he'll start to have an inkling then. [/quote]
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