Reply to My parents that were good parents treat me differently as an adult

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it's a function of their age and stage in life and doesn't really have to do with you. But you're they're child and they are expressing/taking things out on you because it's "safe" to do so. Seems like they're struggling to feel relevant or know what to do with their lives. They might be the type (like mine) who made every decision for the good of the family/children or their own parents, but did not develop their own interests/passions or do things for themselves. Now they feel lost or unappreciated or are wondering what it's all for.[/quote]

OP here. Yes, I totally feel this is the case. My dad is better, but my mom is a social person but doesn't have many friends. I always encourage her to meet people, hang out with friends etc., because I think it's good for her. It is really hard to get her to do this. She is very needy when it comes to family members (some of my cousins too). I wish she would meet more people and be more social. When we come to visit, it is like they can't leave us alone for a single minute and talk non-stop to us. When DH and I are trying to care for our 3 little ones, we can't always give my parents undivided attention. Honestly, whenever our visits end, DH and I are exhausted because of this...

Sorry for the vent here. I am just so tired after this last visit. I feel like throwing in the towel with them, but know that is not a solution. I need to learn how to set boundaries better. I try to limit our visits, but even that doesn't work all the time...[/quote]

Quoted PP here. I think you need to set some boundaries in a way that makes it clear that you're hiding things from them or actually trying to distance yourself. But if they're insecure they may feel that way anyway.

Simultaneously work on getting your mom into SOMETHING. Anything that gets her a life.[/quote]

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