Reply to Male Acquaintance Claims He Was Raped by His Girlfriend

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[quote=Anonymous]I am a woman. I have a male acquaintance, distant friends of friends. I have had some rather odd interactions with him at lunches or dinner or happy hour gatherings. I recently learned that a few years ago while serving in the U.S. military as enlisted, he tried to report a rape while he was passed out from too much drinking. At first, I thought he was sexually assaulted or sodomized by another man, and he claimed the authorities refused to take his statement.

However, I have since learned that his claim is that a woman at his house raped him when he was too tired to refuse. He says they then went to her house, where she raped him again. He then claims she used guilt to make her be his girlfriend for months, using the guilt of the rape. He claims he specifically told her he did not want to have sex with her that night and he did not want to be in a relationship with her. However, he claims  that he was essentially forced to have a relationship with her as boyfriend/girlfriend because she used the guilt of forcing him to have sex with her that one night, against his will at his house and then later at her house.

I find his rape claim, and his years spent as a victim of rape, very troubling. I also don't believe him. If it matters, this is a man who weighs over 200 pounds and is over six feet tall. My perspective is that perhaps he was victimized as a child, and this event was a trigger event for him. Or, perhaps he was actually the one who raped her, and thought he would claim she raped him instead. Or, he believes his story. Perhaps he doesn't understand the legal definition of rape or sodomy.

What is your opinion? Is this a normal or healthy way for a grown man to process this event? [/quote]

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