Reply to He says he's old-fashioned, but keeps letting me set up dates, and pay

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[quote=Anonymous]Been out with this guy twice now, with a third date scheduled for tomorrow. We're both in our mid-30s, met online. Both university-educated and have good jobs.

His profile said he was a bit old-fashioned, and so I'm a bit surprised at some of his choices. For our first date, he asked me out, and chose the restaurant. It's worth noting that I had suggested just drinks, but he wanted dinner so we could get to know each other better. At the end of the date, when the bill came, I pulled out my credit card, and he pulled out his, and we split the bill. I'm cool with that, but would pay for someone's dinner if I was the one who said we should have said dinner, instead of just drinks like they suggested.

Second date, he asks, but suggests that I pick the place. He then insists I pick the wine, and the appetizers we share. When the bill comes, I'm in the bathroom. When it's time to leave, he gets up from the table and just leaves the little bill-container-envelope on the table. I think maybe he paid while I was in the bathroom, but don't want to assume anything, so I grab it and follow him. At this point he's like, right, we should pay at the bar. So I put my card into the little holder thing, he puts his on top of mine, and gives the envelope thingee to the bartender. Apparently the bartender put the whole total on his card, because he asks bartender "aren't you going to split this?" Bartender then splits it, and we each pay half.

For our date tomorrow night, again he suggested I pick the restaurant, so I have. I guess I'm just confused. I'm cool with splitting things (wouldn't keep agreeing to dates if I wasn't)  and I have plenty of restaurants I like that I can suggest, but it seems odd that he's pretty insistent about both since he specifically mentioned he's old-fashioned. He does seem old-fashioned, in that he told a story about wanting to make sure his sister's fiance was able to financially take care of a family. It's worth noting that just on these two dates, we've established that he's a pickier eater than I am, so having me choose repeatedly doesn't necessarily make sense.  He definitely seems interested, in that he contacts me daily, wanted to see each other twice this weekend, etc. All I can figure is that maybe he's letting me pick the restaurants because he doesn't want to suggest anything himself that might be more than I wanted to spend, since I'm paying for myself?

Also might be worth noting that he hasn't asked for my phone number, or given me his, yet. I've never gone on more than one date with someone from online before that happened. We're still just messaging on the site.

So, thoughts? Why the insistence on me choosing (from the locations to the wine to the food)? Why the deliberate bill-splitting, if he's old-fashioned? Is he just not that into me? I fully expect a number of posters to flame me for even mentioning money and say I'm a gold-digger, but other than not posting this, I can't control it. [/quote]

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