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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Of course she's delusional, OP. [/quote]
The definition of delusional is someone actually believes what he/she says. Not all mentionally ill people are delusional.  Even if they can't control their lying  due to their mental illness or personality disorder, they are not necessarily delusional.

The truly delusional people will act based on what they believe, although the belief is false.  For example, they fear those who they falsely believe have abused them. In other words, their actions and their false beliefs are consistent. MIL is not afraid of any of these abusers. She doesn't confront the abusers about the abuses. Actually, she keeps "good" relationships with these alleged abusers.  She only tells people how others abused her. It almost seems she's trying to build relationships by making others sympathize her and admire her. She selectively lies based on the audience. If the right audience isn't there, she can also choose not to lie. If she truly believes she's kidnapped and abused by her sister, why would she sent her young children to spend extensive amount of time at her sister's house without parental supervision? Instead, she keeps good relationship with her sister and talks with her every other week. If she truly believes her financial advisor cheated her on her money, why is she still on friendly term with him and using him to manage all her account? She told people who didn't know her during her college years that she graduated from UVA, but didn't tell the lie to those who certainly knew the truth such as her sister and her parents. Her wedding announcement with the false information was published in FIL's hometown only. If some lies were about to be revealed when multiple people were present and talking, she became nervous and switched the topic as fast as she could. She told DH that SIL did this horrible thing and then turned around to tell SIL that DH did this thing. Two versions of the story on the same day. Which version is her delusion?

Based on the countless instances we observed, I don't think she's delusional.  Mentally ill, yes.  Paranoid, yes. Personality disorder, highly likely. But delusional, no. [/quote]

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