Reply to how much should i interfere in my kids' friendships? 6 yr old DD

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
DD is 6 and in KG and her bestie, larla, (from preschool) is a great kid - smart and confident and creative and sweet, but bossy and exclusive. DD has been her best friend since they joined preschool.  Larla makes a huge point to leave other kids out and play only wit hDD - which was a problem in preschool ("you can't play with us. you're not best friends with us" - which the preschool teachers addressed) and has continued, since we meet up with a lot of our old preschool friends (most of us have 2nd and third children at the preschool). I am always the one reprimanding my DD for being mean when it's Larla who says stuff like "Sorry, Darlene, we're playing a game for only two kids. YOU can't play. Too bad for you" and "Sorry, Darlene, the secret is for bestie and me only." (The reason I reprimand my DD if b/c she goes along with Larla. And I once saw Darlene burst into tears and that was totally unacceptable to me)

I have tried prepping DD for events when there will be more kids - so that she is aware that I expect her to be kind to everyone. I' ve always talked about how she can be best friends with Larla and have secrets, but that she can't make other people feel bad about that. I think she gets it. Yesterday, when my DD, Larla, and Darlene were together, I saw my DD go out of her way to help Darlene when she tripped and fell and I told her right away (quietly) that I was proud.

Larla also has a lot of stuff. Her parents are actually very modest and truly wonderful people,  but the kid lacks for NOTHING. She gets (very expensive) toys ALL the time, it seems to be on a daily basis. And she kind of seems to rub that into my DD - "I got 2 new shopkins yesterday and my mommy ordered me the new princess Anna dress - have you seen it? It's new - Disney just came out with it."" (the tone makes it even more braggy). Interestingly, I think our HHI is double Larla's, but we have much less stuff.

So, do i interfere and limit their contact? Or is that way too much helicoptering? Maybe she should learn to deal with all different people without so much of my oversight...

[/quote]

I'm not sure I can offer any real advice other than buckle up and get ready for the ride.  This kind of stuff is very common among girls all thru school and honestly- all thru adulthood.  Is it really any different than DCUM behavior?  I would encourage my daughter to expand her circle of friends, help her build relationships rather than rely on an insufferable bitch to define who is in her circle, and prepare for your daughter's inevitable ouster from the insufferable bitch's little club.

Its just starting and it will only get worse.  [/quote]

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