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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wasn't sure where to put this, but family sadly seems to the the right place.

When DD was born, during labor, I found out that my cervix was scarred.  I hadn't had any checks until then, and my midwife later said she had only seen scarring like that with women that had cone biopsies - or were abused.  I'd never had an cervical surgeries.  During labor she asked if anyone had ever hurt me, because I was having a hard time with the checks and pushing and the pain.  I do assume she'd had experience with abused women before.

I also, for as long as I can remember, had been afraid of sex.  We waited until after marriage, and although our sex life is just fine, I know being willing to wait that long is not normal.  I put off pelvic exams util pregnancy because I was so afraid of them.  And declined cervical checks.  I couldn't stand being that exposed.  Also not normal.

You see where this is going.

I have no memories of any kind of abuse, but so many question marks have come up lately that I wonder.  Is this something I should start asking questions about?  I know families have secrets - am I overthinking or could something have happened to me?  Do I pursue it or let it be?[/quote]

Everything you describe is normal -- not liking cervical checks; hating to be exposed; easing your way into sex; having a hard time pushing.  Where did you get the idea this was abnormal?   There isn't a woman alive who likes having her cervix checked.  Or who has an "easy time" with the pushing and the pain.  An easy time with pain?  Are you kidding me.

OP, you are extrapolating back from an offhand comment made by a ding-dong and using it to decide that what was a perfectly normal experience was something sinister and strange.  [/quote]

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