Reply to Divorce - what to look out for?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Divorce - what to look out for?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I had a really amicable divorce. My advice:

1. Figure out where both of your triggers are, acknowledge them and make an effort to avoid them when negotiating about stuff. For my ex, it was money: any situation where it seemed to him like I was "after his money" was going to turn bad really fast. We agreed to what we would pay for. We agreed to a child support figure. It was based on DD's needs and our lifestyle needs, rather than on the calculator or our incomes. Basically, we created a budget for each household and figured out what the best way to move money around in order to make it work was.

2. Remember, if you're talking to a lawyer, that that lawyer is going to be dealing with what "most" people do and doesn't know you or your husband or your relationship. My lawyer wasn't thrilled about our financial arrangement (which wouldn't work for everyone) because she thought I "could've gotten more money" and didn't seem to understand why that wasn't important to me as long as the things that I needed to be taken care of were.

3. Don't forget who you and your ex are. He is not going to magically start doing everything you wanted him to do when married now that you are divorced. There is actually LESS incentive for him to do those things now. So a person who is late all the time or makes promises he can't keep is not going to suddenly become punctual or reliable as a result of divorce. Do yourself, your STBX and your kids a favor and don't punish each other for that sort of thing.

Good luck.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics