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[quote=Anonymous]My two cents, which might be worth even less.

1) You express dual concerns here, both about the parenting choices and the school.  Important to keep those distinct in your mind.

2) You probably need to let go of the ongoing concerns about the parenting.  No parents are perfect, you can't know as much as the parents about what they are facing with this child, and even if you did you wouldn't be in a position to enforce any insights you have.  Other than providing a sympathetic ear and responding to solicitations of direct advice, you should try to get to a place where you accept the other parent's choices even if they're different from the ones you would make.

3) The school is another matter, because the parent seems to be expressing concerns.  If you share her concerns, it's perfectly fine to say so if she asks.  And if she asks for help in searching for a new school or in how she should approach her current school, by all means offer your thoughts.  It's totally fine to suggest to your friend that she put on the table whether additional behavioral goals and supports should be part of the IEP.  PP is right that you can't "stage manage" the IEP but that doesn't mean you can't make suggestions for your friend to consider.[/quote]

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