Reply to 9 cycles, CCRM veteran ask me anything (yes, bfp)

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[quote=Anonymous]I am have spent the last four years of my life undergoing fertility treatments and am now 18 weeks pregnant.  I thought I would share some of the things I learned because if I had known then what I know now I wouldn't wasted as much time.  Also, having spent about 15 months cycling with CCRM I can tell you pretty much anything you want to know.

Just for the record, I do know I am incredibly fortunate to have been able to afford all this.  It's still hard, though, no matter how you slice it.

I did 3 full local ivf cycles, plus two iui cycles (total waste of time, never let them foist that on you if your numbers are bad).  Oh yeah, and before all that there was a totally unnecessary laproscopic surgery that I had due to a faulty HSG test.  You can spasm during the test and it looks like a blocked tube.  That was a lot of fun.  After pursuing my local options, I then went out to CCRM and did 6 retrievals (1 cancelled cycle and one where they didn't get any eggs at all - that was absolute rock bottom), froze all 12 embryos, 5 made it to day 5 for CCS testing (where they test for chromosomal abnormalities which are major causes of miscarriage), got two "normal" or euploid embryos which were then transferred and now I'm pregnant with one.

I started this when I was 36, having no idea that I would have any problems, and was told I had diminished ovarian reserve.  Basically you aren't in menopause yet but you might be soon.  I don't remember all my numbers now, but I do remember my AMH was .22 and everything else, including antral follicle count were similarly bad.  At the beginning my local doctor told me the chances of conceiving with my own eggs were less than 5%.  He was right.  I probably made around 25 eggs out of all these cycles (I was definitely a poor responder) and only one made it.  If nothing else I wish I had really heard that at the time.  I knew it intellectually but couldn't really take it on board and so we plowed ahead.

The reason I went out to CCRM was that up to that point I had really been in the land of wishful thinking, just one more cycle that'll be the one and we'll just keep doing the same thing and somehow the result will be different.  What I like about CCRM is that they take a pretty straightforward scientific approach - their primary distinctions being the excellent lab and the near universal use of CCS testing.  CCS testing was appealing to me because I needed to know (for my own peace of mind) if all my embryos were bad or not so I could move on.  My doctor was Schoolcraft and as others have mentioned, he's not super personable, but he tells you everything straight up and I appreciate that.  I had a lot of hand holding at my local clinic when what I probably needed was a reality check.

If you go to CCRM you must be prepared for the incredible amount of time you will need to spend in Colorado.  Each cycle I was there about a week and you don't know until a few days ahead when you'll need to come out.  They give you a calendar ahead of time of course, but the precise timing is only clear at the end so all airline tickets are last minute and expensive (pro tip - take Frontier from National much cheaper than United which is the only other direct flight which you'll want since you'll be carrying refrigerated medicines with you - really, really expensive medicines).  Your partner can come out for 3 days at the end (day before, day of retrieval, and to escort you home) or do frozen but fresh is preferred.  Plus it's nice not to be totally alone the whole time.  One good thing I can say about all that time is that Denver is a pretty cool place and I found a fair amount to do.

Another thing is that a cycle is not one month, but most likely two.  I had to do a month of priming before each cycle so I was continuously on medicine for over two years with only a break from when I switched from local to CCRM.

There is a lot of frustration at CCRM's communication.  They absolutely do not do email.  You must call them, leave a message, and they call you back.  The first two cycles this went perfectly but then it kind of fell apart.  But they never missed a deadline on getting me instructions or calling in medicines.

One thing they do wonderfully in terms of customer service is the amount of education they provide.  As part of your one day work up you spend most of the day in educational classes learning about some of the science behind what they do.  I found it very enlightening and empowering.  It really helped me detach more from this process and all the ups and downs of magical thinking and getting me to think about this more like a science project.  My nurse, Lisa, was also great about answering all my questions and if she didn't know the answer she'd ask Dr S and she'd get back to me promptly.

By the end of all this I think if I hadn't gotten pregnant I wouldn't have gone on to do donor egg.  By this point I was definitely open to it (I for sure wasn't at the beginning and saw every suggestion of it almost as an attack which was foolish) but I was so tired I just couldn't do it anymore.  Four years is too much.

Did I mention I quit my job earlier this year too?  It was a job I needed to quit for all sorts of non-ivf related reasons, but I mention it to highlight what a commitment this process can be.  It can swallow your life whole.  I am fortunate that my husband is the calm and patient one and strangely this process has probably made us closer.  But I know it could easily go the other way given all the stress it puts on your life.

Anyway, I am happy to answer any questions.  Even if you draw different conclusions from your own experiences I know a lot of helpful practical stuff too.

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