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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thanks  for the replies, especially 11:40 above. Trust me, I have been working on shutting down criticism and sarcasm  for years. As PP above noted, it just gets exhausting after a while. I feel I have to be constantly on guard and ready with a positive redirection. A therapist I worked with in the past suggested saying something like "Can you rewind how you said that please?" in a very calm, neutral tone. It is very effective.  Sometimes, I'll think the two of them are getting along great, I will let my guard down, and an eruption will occur. It is depleting to have to deal with this on top of the holidays.
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Also be honest with yourself - how critical have you been of your kids? My experience has been that my parents - especially my mom - was hyper critical which in turn lead us kids to be hyper critical of each other as well. My mom tolerated it too much because she had a hard time seeing the behavior because she was so used to do it herself.  [/quote]

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