Reply to "Engagement" ring years after the fact? Yay or nay?

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Reply to ""Engagement" ring years after the fact? Yay or nay?"

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[quote=Anonymous]DH and I got married over 15 years ago when we were both grad students, and dirt poor.  He proposed with no ring, over a couple of beers, I said yes, we both giggled like a couple of kids (which we were), and now we both have jobs, 2 kids, a mortgage, a dog, a cat, the whole nine yards of a stable marriage.

I do not stand much on tradition and I never had a ring, and it didn't occur to me for years to make any issue, but lately, it's been bugging me.  Like, really bugging me.  I guess it bothers me that it never occurred to DH to feel bad or grateful I agreed to marry him while dispensing with a seeming ironclad engagement ritual.  I mean, no one I know got married without a ring.  Some are small, some are big, some are inherited and some are purchased at jewelry stores, but all are some sort of gemstone set in a precious metal, and the man got it.

I asked him to get me a ring, and the first words he said were, "uhh, how much are you expecting to spend?"

It made me mad.  I mean, we can afford a ring now, dammit.  DH doesn't feel bad at all!  If it were me in his shoes, I might have have gotten married on a shoestring budget if times called for it, but I would make it up to my spouse years later if it seemed important, and not nickle-and-dime even then.

Am I justified in finally wanting a real diamond ring?  DH has never purchased any jewelry for me that cost more than $15, and I only buy costume jewelry for myself, so I am not dripping in diamonds and pearls.  It would be my one piece of really fine jewelry.

I want a brilliant cut diamond solitaire ring at least a carat-and-a-half, set in white or yellow gold.  It will probably cost between $5,000 and $10,000.  It's not something I would ever buy for myself.  And I am really angry at DH for dragging his feet.

Am I being irrational or is DH a cheapskate, insensitive jerk?

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