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[quote=Anonymous]Since Christmas is so close, I would allow him to come back but not allow friends over or him to take the car.  If he seems to be taking it seriously, you could allow friends and/or car on a "trial" basis, but for now it's probably fine if you say no.  And while he's not your responsibility any more in terms of child protective services, whether he is morally your responsibility depends on your arrangement with him for college, etc. ("live on campus and come home for the holidays", etc.).

As for him eating all of your food, that's just something you put up with when you have guests.  If you don't want to pay for his food when he visits, you could always not invite him home for the holidays, but that seems like a short-sighted reason to heavily damage your relationship with your son.

And surely you have responses to him saying you are treating him like a child?  First, maybe you are in the way in which you ask; but you could also make it clear that adult visitors to your home help out with household chores, too, since you are not a hotel.  His alternate choice is to pay to stay in a hotel.  Etc.

Basically, I don't think I quite see what the big deal is, a lot of this seems par for the course and working out new adult child/parent relationships; it mostly seems like you need to establish better house-rules for adult, visiting children.  But maybe there is more going on than I see.  [/quote]

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