Reply to How did you break it to your kids that Santa isn't real and at what age?

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[quote=Anonymous]My kid started asking pointed questions when she was 4 (even declaring Santa wasn't real) and it was pretty apparent that she didn't believe by the time she was 8. However, she still wanted to believe, and it wasn't until she was 10 that she flat out asked.

The way we handled it, was starting when she was around 4, we would "play Santa" for the pets and other animals. We'd make bird feeders for the birds outside. We'd make and buy toys and treats for our pets. She'd help wrap them and we'd make gift tags and sign them "from Santa's helpers." By the time she was around 6, I shifted my language from playing Santa to being Santa. It was our job to be Santa for the animals. She would sometimes ask if she could get an extra present for a person and have that be a secret Santa present. We also talked a lot about the story of St. Nicholas and how we believe the joy in the season is in giving to and doing for others, and how lovely the world would be if everyone was like Santa and not just in December. We're not religious, but I found myself co-opting a lot of the spirit of the season stuff I'd learned growing up in a religious family.

So when our 10 year old flat out asked (my husband asked her in return if she REALLY wanted to know the truth, and she affirmed it, and so he told her, but again fell back to reaffirming the joy of the season) I think it was most important that we assured that nothing would change. We weren't going to do away with Christmas just because there was no physical Santa. There were still going to be cookies left out. There would still be the letter from Santa. There would still be gifts from Santa.

The big deal for our daughter? She was in tears when seconds after the Santa conversation, she realized that there was no tooth fairy. And she made us describe how we had managed some of our tooth fairy antics like the time she lost a tooth on a class overnight and the tooth fairy still came. So be prepared for the cascading knowledge and subsequent questions that officially addressing the Santa Question might cause. I think us having her play/be Santa for the family pets and wildlife helped ease the transition as well.

Oh, we did tell our daughter that we weren't going to be keeping separate Santa wrapping paper anymore, and we carefully watched the following Christmas to make sure that wasn't a big deal for her, and it wasn't. It was just such a hassle keeping wrapping paper hidden from her and to only use it on Santa presents! Our teenage daughter still likes spending a couple minutes on the NORAD santa tracker every year as well. It's funny the things they latch onto.[/quote]

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