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[quote=Anonymous]DW has refused a cleaning lady in the past; at that time she was a SAHM with two little ones. DW was never very organized -it's not one of her strengths. That and her thing is clothes - one of these women that explain to you how they saved you money buy buying their 143rd pair of shoes because they were on sale.

In the past DW would claim that cleaning lady's didn't want to clean. I think now she was having a hard time getting ready for them, in terms of just picking up. So, fast forward, couple of teens, one tween, and a wife that went back to work. House is at the point where DW won't allow guests and if I start to clean in a particular area she was always re-direct me. So, frankly the answer can't be the typical DCUM you need to do more because she doesn't want me touching her stuff. Little ideas like sort the junk mail at the Post Office instead of bringing it home fall on deaf ears because she likes to "go through the mail".

Her housekeeping habits have been a source of contention and frankly while she was a SAHM mom for alot of years I did expect her  to "keep the house" while I worked to afford the luxury of her raising our children. That didn't work out too well.

We did not live together before marriage because of DW's religious convictions and family pressures/expectations. I believe that was a mistake because we probably would have realized we were incompatible.

So, I guess any thoughts for living with someone who I guess is a borderline hoarder or clothes horse ?

Thanks.[/quote]

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