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[quote=Anonymous]Would you be ok in supposedly close, loving relationship where your man gets hit on constantly by other women - many of them yours and his college friends - and him flirting back and enjoying the attention? And would you give him a hall pass after he dumped you and took you back?

My friend from college (we were roommates freshman year, very casual friends since then) is in this kind of relationship. I didn't have much contact with her for years except for birthday and holiday greetings and occasionally chats, but recently we got back in closer touch and I've found out all this. Her boyfriend is actually a good guy and she's been seeing him since college (we are all in our early thirties) and I think they plan to get married. But he flirts like a single man, sometimes right in front of her. She says she trusts him and gave him a hall pass. I asked her if she had one for herself and she said no, she didn't want one.

WHAT????

My friend is not a doormat, she's a strong, smart, independent woman. Not the brightest bulb in the box but certainly not a fool either. And her boyfriend has always come across like a good guy and I like how he appears to conduct his life, although to be frank I don't know him as well.

I just am so puzzled by this relationship, but I am not necessarily "close" enough to my friend to ask questions or tell her she's an idiot.

Don't respond with MYOB. I think there's nothing wrong with being curious about how this works. Is this a common relationship arrangement? Is it as unhealthy as it looks to me?[/quote]

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