Reply to Brother leaves same-sex partner for a woman and wants to bring her home for the holidays

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Brother leaves same-sex partner for a woman and wants to bring her home for the holidays"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
I wouldn't want her either. However, it's his life, and it's Christmas, and he's trying to meet you half-way by suggesting the hotel. I would take him up on that offer by telling him they should BOTH stay at a hotel, and come for meals and activities. And remind him not to engage in PDAs in your house, for the sake of your kids.

BTW, DH and I have the same age difference as your brother and his new SO, so it can work long-term.
[/quote]

I originally started to write a response, but it got long and didn't stay on point, so I canceled.  You said succinctly what I was trying to say and did it better.

OP, your brother has moved on.  I understand why this is disruptive to the family, but he has a right to move on with his life and you need to try to be supportive.  He has a new love interest, and she has nowhere to go for the holidays, so he invited her.  I agree that having her stay in a hotel is a nice compromise and asking him to keep PDAs limited just for the short-term until the family can adjust is not unreasonable.

And for children's continuity it is important to keep good ties where you can.  I agree with the other PP that you should let the ex-uncle know that he is still welcome to see you and the kids, as long as you schedule it around your brother's visits so that there aren't any awkward issues.  My sister-in-law wasn't sure how our family would react when she divorced my brother.  But we finally got through to her that she may have divorced my brother, but she was still the mother of my nieces and for my parents the mother of their grandchildren.  She will always be family.  Fortunately, after a couple of years, my brother and his ex- were able to coexist in their daughters lives amicably.  But it helps the children with continuity to know that all the adults in their lives can get along even when a relationship dissolves.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics