Reply to WWYD? DD doesn't want to apply for AAP

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The title says it all.  DD went so far as to say that she would purposely do badly on the re-take of the Cogat.  She says it will be more work, she doesn't want to do more work, and she already does get frustrated sometimes even with having little work that is easy for her.  The gen. ed class this year (4th grade) and last year (3rd) have been easy, and AAP would be a challenge, I think DD is somewhere in between gen. ed and AAP.  I'm concerned that by not taking AAP, that some doors will be closed in the future, like math in high school.  Also, DD's older sister is in AAP, and she is doing great.  On the other hand, if DD is not mature enough yet for harder work, even if she could do it, maybe she shouldn't.  Thoughts?[/quote]

I wouldn't push.  If she fall between AAP and GE, she'll have plenty of peers in GEN ED.  Don't buy into the hysteria.[b] NO MATH DOORS [/b]will be closed to her if she isn't in AAP.  My non-AAP kid did algebra in 7th and geometry in 8th and is doing  the same math in high school as his AAP brother, who ran out of high level math classes by his senior year.

The people who talk about push, push, pushing on this thread are usually folks with younger kids who know NOTHING or from cultures that over-stress academics because historically the options for all but the highest achieving were so limited.   Better a child be happy and comfortable at her/his elementary school like many of my kids' AAP qualified friends who chose to stay at local schools (and are now indistinguishable from most AAP kids in HS, btw).   There's plenty of stress down the road in HS and beyond without laying the hammer down on kids and preteens.

Your daughter is young and will find the things that interest her and her challenges when she is ready.  Smart kids don't lose intelligence because they're not pushed -- in fact many of them learn quite a bit on their own, which is really what you want to teach anyway.  I've had two in general ed, who I'm sure lots of people would have angled to get into AAP, but they were happy just where they were. One is getting straight As in honor classes in middle school, the other doing great in his IB program.

IMO, parents need to resist passing on their anxiety that their kids are missing out on some secret formula for learning if they're not in AAP.  Sometimes, I feel like it's the parents who weren't standout students themselves who stress the most.  I get that, but like the frustrated athlete trying to live through his/her kid (as I've been guilty of becoming on occasion ), it's worth learning to just support your kid in who they are and let go.

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