Reply to How do you deal with the habbit of not putting thing back of your spouse?

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[quote=Anonymous]I get really tired of my spouse doing this. I comment on it sometimes, but have found ways to deal with it. One thing is we have a counter in our laundry/mud room that gets piled high with his miscellaneous things that he can't ever seem to just put away. Therefore, I have designated half the counter as his, and half as mine. My side includes dog treats and dog leash and other dog supplies, plus a little box for my miscellaneous things like gloves or sunscreen. His side includes who knows what. In the past, I've tried to organize for him, but it never lasts. When his things encroach on my side, I just shove them over to his side. I don't like the look of the messy counter, so when it gets unbearable, I sort and put away what I can (if I know what to do with it), and put the rest in a box and give it to him. Last time, that box wound up in our garage and it's still there 5 months later. So this solution only kind of works for us.

Something that does work for us is that over time I've bought my own things...my own nail clippers, my own tool box, my own tape measure (I even taped name labels to my tools), extra scissors, a flashlight I keep in my nightstand (where he wouldn't think to check), etc.

So, I know you're the other half of this problem, but maybe you can buy some new items like tools and nail clippers and make a commitment to only use YOUR things, so her things never get misplaced. And then designate an area for your things which MIGHT make it easier for your spouse to deal with, if all your things are concentrated in one space.

As far as communal things like bleach, or every day things like your hat or slippers, you really need to step up and start putting those things where they belong. Just the other day, after day after day of my husband taking off his shoes smack dab in the middle of the doorway of a high-traffic area, I finally told him to please STOP! It's maddening. I'm just telling you this so you understand that your spouse isn't just a nagging or controlling harpy; he/she is actually just reacting to what comes off as disrespectful. [/quote]

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