Reply to How do you deal with the habbit of not putting thing back of your spouse?

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[quote=Anonymous]I have only skimmed this thread, but have two thoughts.  The first is to put things on the stairs when they need to go back to their home.  I'm like you and prefer to combine trips.  If you can train yourself to do this intermediate step, then the rest of the way is easy... just pick up the stuff on the stairs when you're headed up there anyway.

The second thought is that one of the biggest issues in my parent's marriage was that it drove my mom crazy when my dad wouldn't put stuff back in its place.  They ended up getting divorced after 25 years, and believe it or not, this was a central issue for her.  I think it amounted to her feeling like my dad didn't realize or care how important it was to her to put stuff back where it belongs (because it just sent her over the edge when she was trying to run a household with 3 kids and couldn't find what she was looking for)... and the fact that my dad wouldn't make it a priority to do something that was so important to her made her feel disrespected/unvalued/unloved.

Not saying that will happen to you, but sometimes the small stuff can symbolically feel like big stuff.  If it's important to your husband, you should figure out how to at least meet him halfway (the stairs).[/quote]

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