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[quote=Anonymous]A few things:

1) Have your mother and MIL interact as little as possible.  That means MIL doesn't get to come over when your mom comes to visit, unless it's something like a child's birthday or celebrating a major holiday.  Just don't overlap.  If your mom lives far away, MIL can deal with not seeing you for a week while she visits.

2) You see your MIL more than once a week?  That's a lot.  I think it's totally ok to have her a bit less involved in your lives, particularly as the kids get older and busier.  Less interaction may actually help you deal with this better.  And, please, it's not punishing anyone to see them three times a month instead of six.  That's still a good deal of time.

3) You can't fix this.  I think people often put really high expectations on IL relationships, when if we just hoped for friendly we'd all do a lot better.  Accept the reality you got, rather than the dream that you wanted.

4) I wonder if DH really did you any favors telling you some of the details of those conversations.  It's not like you and MIL are going to talk about it, so there's not much you can do other than try to drop it and move on.  And, frankly, your MIL is insane if she can't just shut up and be grateful that you guys live close by and that she gets to see the grandkids all the time thanks to her gracious DIL.  Sheesh.[/quote]

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