Reply to need feedback from a cannabis user married to a non user or vice versa

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Reply to "need feedback from a cannabis user married to a non user or vice versa"

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[quote=Anonymous]Please, do not respond if you arent in this category. Im really in a sad place and Ive drafted three posts and discarded them all. Its just a mess of a situation.

Bottom line is: I want to know if anyone out there has an honest functional relationship as user married to non user/non user married to user.

My husband has never ever done what he says he will, with respect to amount and extent of his habit, and lying about it to me at will in accordance with his own wishes in the moment, as opposed to an agreement mutually decided upon, even with him setting the terms of what expectations should be.

I married someone who had quit a few years before we got married, and I didnt know the habit was going to be reinstated, or that once it was, it would just never unfold the way I was told it would. He made specific statements about how much he would use, and how he would be discreet, and broke every single parameter set forth by himself. When called out on it, all I get is anger and righteousness.

The worst thing is, I am treated like I cant possibly have valid issues, that anything I say is tainted by the fact that I am not a user myself, so I dont understand. Its total bullshit. Ive smoked weed in high school, the only thing I dont understand is the need to take several hits from a one hitter throughout the entire day every day. Especially after explicitly stating that is exactly NOT what would take place.

I also dont understand the righteousness with which he treats his habit. He acts completely entitled to maintain a $300 a month habit although we are in a terribly precarious financial situation. I dont buy myself anything, we dont save, but the $300 is a MANDATORY expenditure by him with no compromise. Its a cut back from his $500 a month habit, you see. Today I found out that he had withdrawn cash from our very low bank account AGAIN without telling me in advance this time because he had given some friends some of his supply and needed to purchase a new supply sooner than he had just promised two weeks before.  "I am an adult. I know who my friends are. I know what needs to be done" is what I get when I get upset.

So, because I am not a user, I dont understand or have any valid points regarding honesty. I know that is bullshit. But I want to hear it from a user who treats their spouse normally and with respect eventhough they arent a user.

I know he has ADD and depression and his communication is naturally not great. But how he communicates about weed is just awful and not partner like at all.

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