Reply to Need to know if I'm expecting too much, tell me what makes your DH a "Great DH" and "Great Father"?

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Reply to "Need to know if I'm expecting too much, tell me what makes your DH a "Great DH" and "Great Father"?"

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[quote=Anonymous]The language police who are always ready to decry "help" as a four letter word are getting tiresome. We get it. My wife doesn't "help" with the bills. When she contributes 30% to the bill paying effort, she's a full partner and, even if she contributed 0%, she has full responsibility for paying the bills.

But here's the thing - running a household has a lot of components. Spouses are going to take the lead on different components - based on time, inclination, skill level, happenstance, tradition, gender prejudice, or some combination thereof. If you and your spouse do every single component on a strict 50/50 basis, congratulations to you but you're probably doing it wrong. And if the spouse who is not leading on a component contributes to the effort, it's an acceptable linguistic shorthand to say they are "helping." My wife "helps" with the lawn sometimes. Sure, it's both of our responsibility. But I mow the lawn 90% of the time. When she kicks in 10% of the time, she's "helping."

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