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Reply to "7 yr relationship, no ring yet - am I wasting my time?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I'll keep this short because nobody wants to read an essay detailing the ins and outs of a 7 year relationships.

Cliffnotes:
- BF and I have been dating for 7 years, ever since senior year of college. I love him, he genuinely loves me. He was only the second man I have ever slept with, plan for him to be my last.
- We are compatible in many ways: same values, personalities mesh well, sexually and emotionally compatible, both from Bethesda and both want to settle here and be close to family.
- BF has talked in the past about how I've brought light into his life and he wants to marry me and I motivate him, etc. But he says he only wants to get engaged when he is more financially stable. He has a good job right now (~$40k a year) but we both come from high-SES families and he wants to go back to school and get an MBA and earn six figures. He is a scientist and doesn't feel he can make much progress professionally. I want to get married now - he keeps saying he wants to wait until he can provide for us better. I have a job but BF is old-fashioned and wants to be the primary provider.
- He does flirt with other women and admires other women but I know I can trust him not to go further and to be honest it's flattering that other women like him. However lately he has been more dissatisfied with our relationship and we get into arguments more often. He has nerdy interests in science (he works in a chemistry-related field) and loves discussing them with other nerdy science-y friends. Basically, BF and his friends are the boys from the Big Bang Theory, and I'm Penny. That is literally how it is. And while he loves me, he shows it more often now that he is a little impatient with my ignorance and lack of interest in the subjects that he likes.

Sometimes I wonder if he has become more dedicated to his intellectual interests as time goes on and if we are drifting apart. We still have sex regularly and are loving, but there is more distance between us. And my friends wonder why we've been together 7 years and I haven't even gotten an engagement ring yet. They also say that plenty of couples, if they're really in love, get married even before they are financially "settled". I'm starting to get worried that I'm not getting a more firm promise of commitment after all these years. Is it normal? [/quote]

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