Reply to When you realize you shouldn't have had kids, what do you do?

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Reply to "When you realize you shouldn't have had kids, what do you do?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I vote for option 3 mentioned by others - stay and work through it with therapy.

When DD1 was very young, I think I was depressed and often felt like I just didn't enjoy parenting and everyone would be better off if I left because I was such a terrible parent.  I honestly thought that she would be better off if I was gone.  Same with my DH, who I thought would be better off without me around and he could find someone else to marry/parent DD1.  I got through that way of thinking with time (and I think I had undiagnosed PPD that lingered for a year or so), and now I realize how extremely damaging it would have been to DD1 if I had left, even though I thought it was for her own good.  I think I was just overwhelmed with depression and was not able to see it.  I am not saying life is perfection now, but I do love my family so much and enjoy my time with them and see how detrimental it would be to everyone, myself included, if I had left.

So, my advice would be to seek therapy.  Your daughter will not be better off without you (unless you are physically abusing her or something like that).  Your daughter deserves a mom who will try to make things work out.  Also, YOU deserve to have a better outlook on the situation.  I sincerely think that you can work on this and make it better.  There are a variety way of improving our situation depending on your economic status.  If you have the funds, you can hire nannies, babysitters, etc.  If you don't, you can talk to your husband about how to divide parenting tasks so that you handle ones that are less stressful for you, or that you are better at.

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