Reply to Inlaws Situation -My Inlaws are basically raising my SIL kids ( 6 and 7)

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Reply to "Inlaws Situation -My Inlaws are basically raising my SIL kids ( 6 and 7)"

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[quote=Anonymous]
OP,

Your husband has to accept the situation.

My MIL raised her first grandchild from birth to toddlerhood because her son and DIL, despite being gainfully employed, highly educated people, somehow were too dysfunctional to be parents. 20 years later, that is by far her favorite grandchild and my kids count for very little.

DH and I certainly do NOT begrudge her this situation, which was not of her choosing. We admire her fortitude in rising to the occasion and taking care of our nephew when he could very well have starved to death or something. He is now a disturbed and dependent young man, because of course when he returned to live with his parents, they didn't take care of him, and it probably explains why my MIL continues to focus on his needs, despite her advancing age and failing health.

Your parents-in-law are good people. They're old. How can you ask that they focus on the portion of their family that is healthy and independent? I assume they love you all very much, but they can't and do not need to express this.

Perhaps your husband has suffered all his life from the fact that his parents always catered to his sister, sensing that she needed help the most. He HAS to get over this, with therapy if necessary. My oldest has special needs, and it is always difficult to balance the demands of all my children, given that my oldest takes the most of my time and energy.

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