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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
[b]This is totally on your BIL - he should NOT be doing this to his brother, period. If your husband can't nip it in the bud by himself, you need to stare down BIL, say "cut it out", and that's it. [/b]It doesn't have to be emotional and dramatic, just tell him firmly to stop. It carries more weight if you do not explain or defend your position!!! You may not like "mothering" your husband, but helping one's spouse is part of being married, isn't it?

My mother can be a verbal bully to me and DH usually steps in with a few curt words when I'm floundering. It makes all the difference to know that he has my back!

Everyone has a shorter fuse when handling family members than when dealing with friends. It's because there's such a history there, and foiled expectations, and childhood trauma.
[/quote]

IF it doesn't stop, then say, "BIL, you are being childish and we're leaving." THEN LEAVE.
No one else notices he's being an ass? IF they want to put up with it, they can. You don't have to. Just LEAVE and cut off all contact until he behaves.[/quote]

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