Reply to What to say when the truth will hurt

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't know if you should MYOB.  He did ask.

Maybe start with some leading questions.  Ask him what he is looking for in a person he wants to have a longterm relationship with.  Ask him what values, traits he finds important.  Then ask him what he thinks other people are looking for in a person they want to have a longterm commitment with.   I don't think you should come out and say he's unmotivated, etc., but maybe you can nudge him in the right direction and get him talking.  Once he starts talking, he might start to see how he chooses to live his life may not attract the type of person he wants to be in a committed relationship with for the rest of his life.[/quote]

This is sort of what I did with my brother, who is not a slacker by any sense of the word, but his expectations and reality really don't align. So I asked him what his priorities were in women to date, and then pointed out how the things he wants don't tend to be rolled up into one person (making a point of not saying anything he wants is wrong, which they aren't, they just don't happen to co-habitate in one person!). I don't know if it changed anything, but at least I answered his question. [/quote]

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