Reply to my parents are not the type of grandparents I wish they could be....help me accept this fact!

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[quote=Anonymous]I love my parents... we have always been "close" and they raised us in a very loving family.  However, they are very much of the mindset of "we raised you, you are now married and we get to have our own life again".  Maybe it is the way baby boomers think but it is really making me very resentful of them.  They live 25 minutes away, never offer to babysit or even ask to come visit.  When I offer to come to see them, they are always accepting and excited...but when I ask for them to come to our place it is "let me check with your dad" or "I don't know if we can do that"....and babysitting is another story... "As of now we can, but I don't know what to tell you if something else comes up"... I have such a hard time understanding why they aren't begging to see their grandchildren or spend time with them. They love to brag to their friends about how we live so close and how wonderful their grandchildren are... I even just offered a suggestion to go to the beach together (we would even pay for the house) and my mom's response was "I don't know...I want to plan a trip to ...blah blah blah... and I've been talking to your dad about doing..blah..blah..blah..."   I just couldn't believe that they wouldn't jump at an offer to spend a week (free) at the beach with their grandchildren.

Because of this, I never ask them for any help and pretty much only see them for special occasions when I make the effort...all despite being 25 minutes away!  I honestly believe they are just in a selfish retired me-me-me phase of their life and it isn't anything we have said or done to them... whenever I have made little comments about "most grandparents would be so grateful to live close to their grandchildren" it doesn't seem to phase them because they just keep talking about their own travel and daily plans.

I want to accept this but it is hard and I wish they wanted to spend more time with our family.  Just a vent...thanks for listing![/quote]

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