Reply to when you don't get along with your parents and there's a GC

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. GC=grandchild. I've seen it used here before.

To the PP, I have been trying to set boundaries. They push back quite a bit. I almost feel sorry for them because DS has become their #1 reason to keep breathing. They see family in a very "all or nothing" sort of way. That's how it was in their own families. Either, we're up your butt 24/7, or we embark on a 30 year grudge match. They will also say manipulative things like, "Seeing DS makes us very happy. He brings us so much joy and we hope to see him again soon." [/quote]

There's a quote from another forum I frequent that seems appropriate here: Sometimes you have to be the bigger b****.  Seriously.

So, seeing your son makes them happy?  Great!  That doesn't mean you have to schedule another visit immediately.  "I'm so glad you enjoy him, Mom!" And then change topic.

You're trained to hear the message behind what they're saying, and you need to start training yourself not to care.  They're willing to sacrifice your happiness and peace of mind for theirs, right?  Time to say no.  It will make them unhappy, but that's not your problem.  If they see your child as their sole source of happiness, that's unhealthy.  Reducing access isn't a crime committed against them.  Your parents need to find ways to spend their time and be happy that don't include you and your kid.[/quote]

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