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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. My fiancé has a lot of respect for the hard work his mother put into raising the children alone, but finds her to be annoying and does not have a close relationship with her. He also supported me 100% regarding the comment, he was more angry than I was. He's not one to hold grudges, and I'd like an apology from her, but whatever. I'm really not terribly angry about the comment. What I am really struggling with is[b] how to have any respect for someone who is so publicly vile[/b]. You wouldn't know it unless you saw her Facebook page. She spouts far right hate speech and blatent lies. My partner and I do not see eye to eye on many issues, but it isn't a big deal. She is out there!  I want to have a healthy, friendly relationship with her. I'm just disgusted by many of the things she has posted on Facebook and don't know how to [b]move past it.[/b] [/quote]

Frankly, I don't think you need to have respect for her or move past it.  She's a bigot.  Period.  I don't respect bigots.  I don't see why I should.

You can simply be polite to her when you have to see her, and otherwise let it go.  You might want to have a healthy, friendly relationship with her, but you need to adjust your expectations based on who she actually is.  Your fiance isn't close to her.  She makes inappropriate and negative comments about you, while pretending to be "kind and open" in person.  You certainly won't want any children you might have to have to be exposed to her bigotry and lies on a regular basis, do you?   [/quote]

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