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[quote=Anonymous]For loving, wonderful family, I would make accommodations for them.

1. No smoking in the house
2. Smoking only in designated areas

I wouldn't go over the top and ask them to wear a smoking jacket or not hold the baby.  They won't be there for long, you know.

If you have a special relationship with them such that you can tell them *anything* and still be met with a loving (rather then defensive) response--which is the case with my parents--I can imagine an exchange like this:

"Dad, I'm so excited to have you meet the baby and the baby meet you and Nana.  Grandparents are the best--she'll grow to love you both so much!  But I have a little thing I want to ask you about, and please forgive me for bring it up. Maybe I'm being neurotic and you can help be brainstorm solutions.

Basically, I'm worried about the smoking.  For a couple reasons.  First, you know that it's not good for you, but you're grown ups and that's your choice. I make choices too, I get that.  But second, I'm worried about second hand smoke and the baby.  I know you'll only smoke outside, but I heard that the smoke on clothes can have an impact too, things like second had smoke triggering asthma and stuff on developing lungs.  In a perfect world, I'd love my baby to love you without cigarette smoke in the air or on clothes coming between you.  Do you think I'm being crazy?  Do you think there's a way to address this in a way that keeps my new mom nerves in check?  I'll admit I'm not being totally rational right now--I'm in new mama bear mode.  Ihink I could probably lift a semi truck off the ground to save my baby, no kidding."

Dad: "Honey, I totally get what you're saying. I don't think a little smoke on my clothes will hurt the baby too much. But I understand that you're a new mom and you want what's best for your little one.  How about this:  I'll wear a robe when I go outside for a smoke, and take the robe off when I come back in.  We'll wash our hands and stuff.  Would that be okay?"

You: "Yeah.  Thank you.  Maybe a patch would help, too, to curb the cravings a little bit?  I don't know, think about it.  I'm sorry to bring up the smoking thing. I love you, you know.  I want you to stick around for a long time."

Dad: "I love you too.  I'll tell Nana about it, don't worry. We'll do our best."

And then they'll come over and smell like smoke, but they'll do their best. :)

A little second hand smoke for the first few weeks probably won't hurt baby for the long term. Tho if baby has asthma, then of course, other steps must be taken.  Probably won't be an issue.

Good luck![/quote]

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