Reply to Have you ever stopped speaking to a sibling because you disliked their spouse?

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[quote=Anonymous]17:20 again.  Yes, yes, OP.  I was at the point where I was ok with not seeing my brother, and my niece and nephew again for 20 years, and giving up on the cousins being pals.

The hardest part is my mom, who wanted this dream family where we were all friends and the cousins played, etc., and she just doesn't get why my SIL has torpedoed all that, and is always looking for a way to make it better.  The truth is, my mom has made it worse by trying to make it better.  What my mom doesn't understand is this:

My SIL doesn't want it to be better; she comes from an unhealthy toxic family and she doesn't like a healthy, nontoxic extended family.  So she will take offense at anything to keep it off-kilter.

So there's no point, really.  All your efforts will be for naught in the end.  All our eggshell-walking was attempts at appeasement--appeasing a bully of sorts, and there is that famous saying about appeasement…something like, "You don't turn a tiger into a vegetarian by feeding it meat"[/quote]

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