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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I really went through this for a few years and then I just didn't have the energy for it anymore. I think its completely normal to feel this way. Today, one would expect me to hate my ex after everything that happened, but I honestly love him again. Even when he's not being kind in return. I am thankful for the good things that came from that relationship, (our child, life lessons i needed to learn, experiencing love). I forgive him and I love my life again. He moved on to another relationship soon after the breakup, which made me wonder for the a long time if he ever really cared.

I think this is a perfect time to figure out what you could have done better. For me, it was to value myself. To trust my gut. That guilt isn't a good enough reason to stay with someone. To speak up when my feelings were hurt and be vulnerable. That being vulnerable is showing strength, not a weakness. To forgive and/or move on faster. That I am strong enough to handle another relationship/marriage and still give it my all.

I believe my ex was one of the best things that ever happened to me and the next man will benefit from what I learned. I truly believe that, which is why I love the guy. And trust me, this is a guy who likes to portray me as the crazy ex. I used to be concerned about him trashing my reputation with his family, friends and SO, but I realized that its just insecurity on his part. Without him, I would still care way too much about what other people thought of me. I had to hit rock bottom to get to the point where I just didn't care anymore, but its so freeing.

I wish you the best, OP, and hope that you will open yourself to love again when you're ready.[/quote]

[b]The world would be a better place if your wisdom and self-compassion could be shared[/b]. I mean that.[/quote]

Agree. I was just thinking this as I read the original post.[/quote]

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