Reply to DH wants to pay for all "our kids" to go to the same school...read details

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Our family looks like this

My DH and and his ex wife have 1 daughter who is 8 and at ABC school
DH Exs wife and her 2nd DH have 1 son who is 4 and will start K in the fall of 2015
DH and I have 1 son who is 2 and 1 DD who is 4 and will start K in the fall 2015

We happily pay for the 8 yr old to go to ABC school.  Ex wife and her DH do not have the means to send their 4 year old to ABC school.  Since our DD will start at ABC school in the fall of 2015 too DH thinks it would be easy for all kids to just go to ABC school since they love each other, play with each other, currently go to preschool together and it would make day to day logistics SO MUCH easier.  I was inclined to agree but now am worried about the future and how we will obviously have to send the kid to middle and high school too so its a huge commitment.  I also worry it might offend ex wife's DH.  We do know that ex wife and her DH are done having children (her tubes are tied post c section) so we don't have to worry about sending future children to keep things fair. We have not extended this offer to ex yet but if we are extending the offer we need to bring it up soon.  Financially it is doable.  Anything I am missing here?  Are we getting ourselves into a huge mess?  I do see DH's point and he feels strongly that if all the kids but him go to ABC school he will feel left out and alienated. [/quote]

First of all, your DH is a decent man. And he is right that logistically it is easy.  All these siblings and 1/2 siblings can either learn to love each other or hate each other. Your DH's plan will likely result in great bonds between all 4 kids.

Now - what would be lovely is if all parents remain classy and never resent each other or disparage what is being suggested.

Secondly, if you have the money - then do the same for MS and HS.  I know your DH biological 1st kid will not be with the other kids in MS and HS (probably) - but her 1/2 siblings from both sides will be.  And then the connection remains.

It is a great suggestion and will work wonderfully if you guys can remain magnanimous and great adults.[/quote]

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