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[quote=Anonymous]DH here. 20+plus years in. DW was always nurturing/maternal, one of the reasons I married her. If it makes any sense, have come to find her selfish, lacking empathy and very stoic.
Sounds contradictory I know but its not. She will be motherly and wifely but the bigger things in life have to be on her terms and is very passive aggressive in securing them. She will make you dinner why basically telling you to go pound sand on life's bigger discussions.
I guess my point is it takes a lifetime to know someone and I am finding out that there are things I really don't like.
Also three kids, suburban life style doesn't seem to afford any luxury for spirituality. Sometimes wonder why I gave up my life worrying about everyone else. I know that sounds selfish but it stems from my believe that the married couple should be the basis of the family unit; not so in my house it has always been others first - MIL and then the kids.
They say once you are empty nesters it gets better. I just wonder what will be left of our relationship by then.[/quote]

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