Reply to When you said you'd always love them, did you mean it?

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Reply to "When you said you'd always love them, did you mean it?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I don't say it because I think it's impossible.  My mother gave me some wonderful advice many, many years ago.  She said that you need to make sure that you are friends with the person who will be your partner.  Love will come and go over the course of your relationship.  The friendship, shared experiences, and shared interest will sustain you and your marriage through the times when your love fades, and when it returns you will feel more bonded to your partner by the knowledge that you and your relationship can survive those times.  I have a partner who I not only love dearly, but am friends with and share interests with.  I have had times when I wasn't quite as much in love and my mother was right (again), that I had no interest in leaving my marriage and was still content in my marriage.  And when the love returned, I felt the stronger for it and knew that this was not the only thing that sustained us.

I still have strong feelings for two previous partners and I know that those feelings for what they are, a genuine love for those people.  But I also know that they are not the right partner for me long term and I value them and my partner too much to do anything foolish about it. I cherish the love and the respect that I have for them.  And I am very, very happy for them that they have found long-term wonderful partners who will be better for them than I could be.  I love them enough that I do want what is best for them.[/quote]

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