Reply to Straight A's but only if I yell

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  She loses all TV,  playdates and electronics when she earns disappointing grades.   However nothing seems to get through to her like the fact that she disappointed me.  Most of the time  I'm pretty even keel but this is the one area where I get rattled easily.  It is a real sacrifice to send her to her school.[/quote]

"She disappointed me"-that's a problem.  You need to find a way to nurture her joy in learning, or send her to a school where she is engaged and loves to learn-it sounds like you have the resources to choose a school that is a good match for her.  I teach college students at a highly selective university (in Baltimore) and I see a good number of students who have no intrinsic motivation to learn, only extrinsic (my parents want me to do this is a big one), they are not happy people, and they are not as successful as the self-motivated students who achieve because they love learning and solving problems.  Achievement through threats and punishments is just setting you daughter up for problems in the future.[/quote]

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