Reply to When no one else will admit they can't afford something

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]quote=Anonymous]I believe that you are doing the right thing, and would cheer you on if you decided to be the first to frankly state that you cannot afford the trip this year (or next).  There is no shame in that, and you get to decide that "can't afford" means "aren't willing to go (further) into debt to make this happen."[/quote]

I'm this pp. I had not read your previous post when I read this because you indicated that this was a summary of that one, which it is not. You are clearly looking for support in rejecting your in-laws' offers of financial assistance, which is fine, but people reading this thread alone aren't getting the full picture. [/quote]

Since I posted that thread, everyone decided to come to Virginia this year so my children could spend time with their cousins ... but an hour away so we will just have to drop the older ones off there for a few days rather than all of us being together. I don't know what will happen next year, but I don't expect to have our plane tickets paid for again. Based on my conversation with my MIL the other day, I think the pressure is going to be ratcheted up rather than them swooping in to save the day again. Her perspective is that we can't wait for finances to improve because the kids are growing up and these years will be gone too soon so we have to just make it happen regardless. I sympathize with that -- it's how I always justified to myself spending money I didn't have -- but I'm experiencing the folly of that way of thinking and am trying to change and not getting any support. Everyone in this forum is so frugal and conservative about money -- brutally so -- I figured it was the place to have my perspective validated. [/quote]

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