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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My fiancé is from a different culture. I have been very open to this in our three years of being together. We are still growing and learning together a lot of it is me getting to know his family and how they function. They are from Cameron in Africa ,they had working class beginnings in cameron and now are middle class. They live in a gated community and have three cars. Out of his ten cousins ( he refers to them as brother and sisters) who are 22 and older six of them still are unmarried and live at home they all have either engineering,nursing , a couple even went to med school. They don't work or look for work,I'm not sure what they do and have left that as their personal business. My husband on the other hand moved here went to an ivy league,  while having two jobs and is finishing medical school. He also was the sole inheritor of millions. His family knows this and uses him to the point of even his frustration, but [b]he just tells me its his culture and will change when we get married[/b]. One in particular greedy "sister" has gotten 20,000 for a remodeled kitchen, 5000 for a down payment on a car,10,000 for "bills" in the past year. THis women makes 200k a year and is married with two children living in New York. We have people calling us from Africa all the time asking for money. His uncle had the nerve to ask him for 7million dollars and stated that it would help my fiancé get more fasfa. His father called him  and asked him to buy a third car. His cousin asks for a new phone every six months. The constant mooching of his family makes me look at them differently.[b]I do not feel that I will be able to stop working fulltime incase he over gives. He has made steps and hired a financial advisor who puts him on a budget but he acts like a child at times and will just pull money from elsewhere[/b].I just am starting to get frustrated with him instead of being on his team. Once these people are done using him and he's spent what he has available he comes to me and I have to pay his phone bill or give him gas money[/quote]

"The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them."  ~Maya Angelou

He is showing you who he is and what choices he makes.  This will not change after you marry.  In fact, it will get more intense because he will have less reason (no reason really) to be different to accommodate you and your needs.

Think long and hard about signing up to this.[/quote]

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